The Standards of A Writer

Writers are often misunderstood creatures. We tend to be a bit introverted, introspective, and self-reflective, yet balance these qualities with a so-called normal life, yet always observant, always wondering how to tell a story, make it valuable, make it real. A favorite film character of mine is a novelist, and he said in response to whether his novel was autobiographical:

Well, I mean, is anything autobiographical? We all see the world through our own tiny keyhole, right? I mean, I always think of Thomas Wolfe... he says that we are the sum of all the moments of our lives, and that anybody who sits down to write is gonna use the clay of their own mind, that you can't avoid that. 1

Well, there you go. In fact, it seems his novel was autobiographical, in some sense, by his standards. I was reading this review of the "writing life" by Oscar Villalon, which showed how one man interviewed all these different writers and published in The Paris Review, a well-know academic journal. The later book was then called The Paris Review Interviews. Article here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99920411&ft=1&f=1032

In reading an excerpt from this, it really made me think about what it is to be a writer, taking from the “clay of [one’s] own mind” and making it valuable. When I go for a run down the beach, I find myself formulating stories about the people I pass on the boardwalk, biking, tanning, playing volleyball, reading, arguing with each other. Each of these persons has a story to tell. So do I. Listening to the waves crash, it makes me feel alive, well, and as if that piece of nature is a part of me. But, as a writer, it does seem strange to imagine not looking at the world that way. Just to enjoy the moment. I sometimes feel like I’m living in the world and looking at it from the outside from some vantage point only I can see from. From my tiny keyhole, I guess. I mean, in looking at the lives of Silvia Plath, Raymond Carver, Franz Kafka, Joyce Carol Oates, James Joyce, Brett Easton Ellis, I think about just how each of these men and women lived. Raymond Carver mentions in his interview that he probably drank more than most people did, and that he found that to be a hazard in the profession he’d chosen. Now, I may not have statistics on it, but it got me thinking. Not that all writers are drunks. More that we choose to experience or have a passion for experiences that will give us more stories, more tales. Writers have that zeal or fire to capture life and then show it on the page. Just like artists do, I guess. I’m not a talented painter, but I do paint. Just another way to express myself. Use a piece of that discontented creativity to express something. My small little piece of how the world looks, or how people seem to speak, what I say in other people’s relationships… Just to find out what’s valuable and again to show that value and meaning through the expression in ink.

1 "Before Sunset Script" - transcript from the screenplay, http://www.script-o-rama.com/movie_scripts/b/before-sunset-script-transcript.html

Addendum to Films That Make Me...

Im not sure I have quite done justice to the many amazing films I've seen over the years. A friend recently corrected me on not including some of those I've mentioned as favs and affected me truly. The following notations are in no way intended to substitute for the in-depth conversations I hope to have with all of you about whether you have or have not seen these films, how, why, and whether it was a choice you made to become a different person, know more of yourself, or just saw a bit of real life in that film...But to spur on those conversations.

I hope not to exclude more important movies that I have not mentioned here, and I am certain I have inadverdently skipped over those of significance. I have done my darndest to give it my best subjective account of films that mean something.

Films That Shocked and Surprised Me
(Because they were that amazing!)

The Hours
The Departed
Sylvia
Beyond Borders
Collateral
Memento
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Requiem For A Dream
Fight Club
The Golden Bowl
Vanilla Sky
How To Make An American Quilt


Emotional Films (Maybe not in the way you assume...)

We Don't Live Here Anymore
Snow Falling On Cedars
The Red Violin
Diarios De Motocicleta
The Golden Bowl
Great Expectations
Taking Lives
Fracture
Unfaithful

Those Classic Witty Ones

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
To Catch A Thief
The Gods Must Be Crazy
Bend It Like Beckham
10 Things I Hate About You
Robin Hood: Men In Tights
Toy Story

Films For Laughter and Tears

I was bored today and decided to think of several movies that have impacted my life is some small way. I've been discussing the films I like a lot lately with different people and it has made me start thinking. Comment if you have or have not seen and what makes you tick. Also, there are plenty of these movies that cross-over, plus it is always a work in progress. As far as television shows I like, I've only placed in one category because they are separate

Poignant Films

Gladiator
Before Sunrise/Before Sunset
Passion of The Christ
Saving Private Ryan
Dead Poets Society
Good Will Hunting
Life is Beautiful
Braveheart
The Lives of Others
The Count of Monte Cristo

Films That Make Me Think/Philosophical/
Feminist/Ethical Theorist

Igby Goes Down
Gattaca
Dot The i
The Four Feathers
Emperor's Club
Brick
Kill Bill Vol. 1 & 2
Donnie Darko
Meet Joe Black
Sunshine

Films That Make Me Laugh

How To Lose Your Lover
Van Wilder
Star Wars: Episodes IV - VI
The Princess Bride

Intense Films

Mystic River
The Usual Suspects
Heat

Films About Love

Roman Holiday
Love In the Afternoon
What Dreams May Come
Closer
The Hottest State

Televison That Rocks

Damages
My So-Called Life
LOST
24

To See The Beauty In A Woman

Listened to an interview today about Uma Thurman and her role on several different movies from "Pulp Fiction" to a new one called "The Life Before Her Eyes"...about a tortured mother and wife, who is dealing with a traumatic experience from her high school observance of a shooting. It is so fascinating to hear this beautiful woman talk about how insecure and fragile she was as an early actress, even doubting her level of attractiveness. She has an intelligent father, a model mother, and started as a model following her mother, before her acting career, but somehow felt she was actually ugly. I know it is tempting to believe it is all a bunch of B.S., but Uma hardly ever shows up in the limelight and I'm truly tempted to believer she is being honest in this interview. I always respect actors/actresses who keep themselves away from the tabloids and am more willing to think there words are true, and not contrived in need of more attention and glamour.

"Uma Thurman finds it odd how she is hailed as a Hollywood sex symbol - because she was so ugly as a child. The 'Kill Bill' beauty insists she was an ugly duckling growing up, claiming her features were so strange it looked as if they were "taped to the side" of her head. And the 37-year-old former model didn't expect big shot movie producers to come flocking due to her beauty, so she concentrated on being a high-school geek instead."

Isn't that lovely? A high school geek. She is a natural, after all. Her father is a leader in Indo-/Tibetan Buddhist studies at Columbia University, which would make her take some of his seeds of growth as a bookworm. It seems apparent to me the influence, especially since seeing the eastern philosophical roots of "Kill Bill". She probably was attracted to the concept at least somewhat from this influence. If you are reading this and know even a little bit about me, you'll be aware of my own bookwormish roots --Again, Daddy. He taught me to question everything and ask lots of questions, be informed and take notes about the world around me. While we still don't agree on a lot of things, he always inspires me, even to this day.

In the meantime, here's the movie, about a complex psychologically disturbed woman, who is still dealing with a violent incident fifteen years later. Her movie is here at this link, if you want to look at the trailer, http://www.lifebeforehereyes.com ...This interview from Uma was of particular interest not only because of "The Life Before Her Eyes" and "Kill Bill" (Yes, I love this movie, and yes, that is why I am referred to as "Kiddo" by some people... And yes, I think it is a fascinating feminst portrayl...) but even because of "Pulp Fiction", which is quite crass for my style, but has some great moments in filmmaking. Tarantino is incredibly stylistic and somehow places his stamp on films so distinctly, you have to stand up and cheer. Words do not create a large enough essence for this master. Scorsese and Allen are maybe the only other directors I appreciate in a similar sense. The individuality which is eeked from the silver screen is untouchable.

If have time, hear the interview by going to the link below. I really enjoyed it! (40 minutes long)

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=89623831&ft=1&f=1008

The Origination of...

Vesper.

Wikipedia describes the name as a greek god from mythology also known as "Hesperos".

In Greek mythology, Hesperos (Greek Ἓσπερος (The Evening Star), sometimes latinized as Hesperus) and (H)eosphoros (Morning Star) latinized as Eosphorus (see Lucifer) are sons of the dawn goddess Eos (Roman Aurora). Hesperus' father was Cephalus, a mortal, while Eosphoros' was the star god Astraios. Hesperos Roman equivalent was Vesper. (cf. "west", direction of sunset/dusk/evening star and "east", direction of morning star/dawn/sunrise). Venus shines very bright because its dense atmosphere of carbon dioxide reflects the sunlight extremely well.

She was also immortalized as James Bond's companion on assignment in Casino Royale and I love the role she plays - wearing a dark trench coat and pantsuit the first time she meets him with an austere eye. In studying feminism in film and culture, I find this character so interesting for a Bond Girl. Indeed, she still has some of the similar traits of Girls of old, good looks and strong temperament, but she is unique. Her face appeals to me in its attraction as not a mere facade, but genuine beauty. There's something about this face and about her androgyngy that truly suits her. And perhaps it is this, complimented by her intelligence that leads me to find myself enveloped in a good sense of this Vesper, and not so unlike the Roman god, shines. She is also a complex character for good and bad, which is so intriguing.

Vesper Lynd is a pun on West Berlin. Like her namesake, the Cold War-era city of Berlin, Vesper's loyalties are split down the middle. Fleming created a cocktail recipe in the novel that Bond names after Vesper.

Not to say that I would like to put on the complete "dress" of a Vesper, with split loyalties, but I find my life neatly compartmentalized at times, through my more calculative way of dividing my emotions and enjoying come what may. Devil-may-care attitude is for the frivolous, which I would not say of myself, although I have some aspects of my personality, which surprise me sometimes. There is a window, at times, which shows me things I do and do not like. Postscript: I do like good surprises.