Turquoise

It has been a long time coming. For all of you who are my readers, I'm sorry it has been so long, but I simply am exhausted from coming home. Ever since my plane landed in Orange Country from London, exactly a month ago today, I've been swimming in the wonder of Europe, even though I'm not anywhere but here in the United States. It is difficult to describe how one can be so changed from just a few days out of their life, but time is another dimension, right? Perhaps not measured in hours, but measured by quality. My quality of life in England, France, Netherlands, Deutschland, and Italia was so drastically different and merveilleux (wonderful) that it has in fact, affected every single day I have been "home"! C'est increyable! My time has been in some ways, very, very morose, because despite being so happy that I had the opportunity to see and do so many activities, and absorb special experiences, I cannot seem to put as much motivation together for my daily responsibilities at work and my downtime is spent soothing my broken heart. Because...my heart aches to be in a country I don't understand, where each moment I'm learning and feeling and doing something that inspires each part of myself. My creativity in some ways is just pouring out of me because of how discontented I am, and yet I'm also so deliriously happy because I have these moments which speak to me each day about how lucky I am to be alive. I cannot even begin to place this into words that make the kind of sense I want. I know these sentences are fragmented and displaced. Yet I cannot help myself. I am drowning. And happy. And sad.

Look into her eyes.